Life

I don't want to suffer anymore. I can't walk anymore, I'm always in pain, I  never see  my friends (I  don't want them to see me  like this.) I'm in dialysis thee times a week, I'm in the hospital more often than not,  I'm always sick, I can hardly see in my right eye, I had three strokes, I suffer from always having seizures, there is much more not even going to talk  about. I just want to know were is my chance to smile?

An animated GIF

An animated GIF

You Know Something.

Life is lovely at times. :) 

Too Many Broken Hearts

Too many broken hearts,

left her soul feeling cursed,

everything will go wrong,

the feeling came first,

She thought was I ever happy,

or was it all an illusion?

in this world of truth, and lies,

every thought is confusing,

as her tears come from,

the clouds of her pain,

in the pleasure of others joy,

The notes of the song are sweet,

but the taste it leaves is sour,

The wound of a broken heart

starts so small,

but grows like a cancer,

until her soul and thoughts,

grow very bitter,

but every tunnel,

has a light at the end,

so don't keep yourself down,

or in these feelings you'll drown,

so always try to swim,

'Cause in time,

what's broken can heal,

and love will come,

and cure all the hurt,

that you feel,

and joy will come,

like the smile on a mother's face,

when she hears

the laughter of her child,

so keep your heart open,

Because after the storm 

of the heartbreaking rain,

The sunshine of love will shine,

and dry up the waters of pain.

Father

Dear my father,

why did you not bother,

to be in the life of your son?

why did you have to shun,

your child away?

why the empty nights and day?

was it something I did,

that made you forbid,

yourself from being present,

in your offspring's development?

you have left me,

with a feeling of empty,

in words I can't truly express,

I try not to depress,

over what could have been,

but I wish we could star over again,

because maybe you do things different,

and be in my life from when I was an infant,

but you can't change the past,

and in today's time at last,

you are a part of my life,

so that lessons the strife,

and our relationship is expanding,

and it gave me the understanding,

of what it means to forgive,

all that have wronged us each day we live.

Lost

Your life is miserable,

but as long as there's snow,

you will bargain your soul,

to play in the the snake's pit,

to fill your black hole,

the venom doesn't bother you,

as long as the result is pleasant,

you try to change,

but your demons are always present,

and you need your daily fix,

of the devil's cake mix,

you want to go to rehab,

but that's not for you,

and your dealers always in view,

and has your ear,

the sweet sound of candy,

is what you want to hear,

it makes you smile,

but only for a short while,

now you need more,

so your knees work the floor,

in your story of sorrow.

Devils Chasing Me

I have devils chasing me, 

through the day,

I can't get them,

to ever go away,

It's a battle upstream,

of nightmares of my 

broken dreams,

Am lost in this confusing,

from thoughts am abusing,

am alone in recluse,

with these Devils,

that won't let me,

 break loose,

they got my soul,

stuck in a noose,

they keep me shackled

hands and feet stuck,

in their chain,

please let me break free,

from their reign,

and grant me,

my freedom,

and let my soul,

rest peacefully in Eden,

so my wings again,

can soar,

in Heaven once again,

once more.